YOUR PAST DOES NOT PREDICT YOUR FUTURE

How often do you judge yourself by comparing your current goals with your past success or failures?

How many times have your past experiences stopped you from having what you really want?

It seems logical to make comparisons with your past, but is it moving you closer to or away from your goal?

I came to the realization that I used to do this all the time. For example, when I’d set a goal to lose weight I’d automatically find myself thinking back to my previous attempts at losing weight; comparing the current option with my previous attempts.

Comparisons like – if I have to keep a food journal and eat salads I’ll get bored because that happened before, so that means it won’t work for me now either.

Or worse if our thinking drops into futility and hopelessness like, “Who am I kidding. Nothing worked before. I’ll never lose weight.”

But it’s not true!

Here’s the thing. The past is thought.

Try to touch it. You can’t; it’s thought.

It no longer exits.

It’s now a memory – made of thought.

The good news is that because the past is thought, it knows nothing about your future.

Read that again. The past knows nothing about your future.

Your results in the past does not predict your future.

You are not the same person you were before. You have new cells, new experiences, and new strengths. You are more than your thoughts.

The only thing stopping you from achieving your goal weight?

Thought.

Could it be this simple?

Yes.

But don’t believe me. Check it out for yourself.

Are you telling yourself the same story? Is your mind trying to take you out, with thoughts like, “it’s too hard, or I can’t do this, or it’s not fair, or what’s the use?”

It might be so familiar that you’re not even aware you’re doing this. In the past I was so focused on positive thinking, that my old negative thoughts gathered quietly like dust behind curtains in an old theatre.

It’s still just thought.

Now it no longer matters what my thoughts are, because I know I have 70,000 thoughts a day, and my memories, my thoughts know nothing about my future.

I mean how could my little ticker tape of daily thought know anything about the real me? Of what I’m capable of?

And the same goes for you.

Your thoughts know nothing about who you really are. You are much more than your thoughts. And your thoughts know nothing about your future, except when you are believing they do.

Try an experiment and see for yourself.

For 10 days, pretend that your limiting thoughts about who you really are is not true. Pretend that you’re limiting thoughts are not real (they aren’t) and that they don’t mean anything about what is possible for your future.

Now who will you be, what will you do if you didn’t believe your limiting thoughts?

“When I believed my thoughts, I suffered, but when I didn’t believe them, I didn’t suffer, and that is true for every human being. Freedom is as simple as that.”  Byron Katie

When I lose weight I’ll have CONFIDENCE

A common reason for wanting to lose weight is to gain confidence.

Many think they lack confidence because they haven’t hit their goal weight yet.

They believe they need to lose weight to feel confident before they can have the things they really want.

Common examples are: If I had confidence I could wear a bathing suit at the beach, I would start my business, or I would ask for a raise, or I would find Mr. Right.

Is this you?

We see others appearing confident, getting the things they want, and having a wonderful life. So we believe that we need confidence first to get what we desire.

Back in the 80s, as a young woman I admired Heather Locklear. I LOVED her big hair (remember I’m talking about the 80s and we had big hair!) and her golden life. She was gorgeous, had the body, any man she wanted, and fame and fortune. A charmed life. I’d thought she was extremely confident which was why she had an amazing life. But recently I read that she tried to commit suicide, had drunk driving charges, assaulted a police officer, stints in rehab.

Of course, knowing what I know now, I’d never want Locklear’s life. Turns out she’s human with her own insecurities. Turns out it doesn’t take confidence to get what we want.

Recently I heard a great distinction.

Confidence is a result – not a requirement.

Courage comes first. Confidence comes as a result of doing. Even if it’s baby steps.

What a relief!  You don’t need to wait for confidence!!!

That thing that you really want?

Courage comes first. Begin with taking a small step.

If you haven’t reached your goal yet, and need accountability, coaching, and support,I have a few spots left for you.

Courage begins with one step.
Email, call or text me today. 204.781.7972

Living Lightly Tip No. 4 – How to Enjoy a Longer Summer!

Is summer already starting to go by too fast?

How we do anything is how we do everything. Are you a fast eater? Fast talker? Rushing all the time? Speeding through life in a blur?

Then try this.

Visit a park or somewhere you enjoy. Take in your surroundings through each of your senses for a richer experience. What do you see? Notice the colours. Tune into the sounds around you. Breathe in the fragrance. Notice a taste in the air? And lastly, take in a deep breathe and sense how you’re feeling. Any tightness anywhere? Let it relax, drop your shoulders. Be in the moment.

Take in a nice deep breathe again. Relax into the now. This moment.

This is a practice and you will have to remind yourself frequently. But it’s so worth it, even if you practice for a few minutes at a time.

It’s like a mini vacation! You’ll experience longer and fuller days, deeper connection with people, and greater peace of mind.

Feeling Trapped with Excess Weight?

Here are 3 common fat thinking traps:

After seven years of providing weight loss coaching, I’ve seen that there are thinking patterns which limit success from achieving a naturally slender body weight.  Here are three common fat thinking traps:

1. ALL OR NOTHING

There are no 50 shades of gray in this way of thinking! How we think about our (excess) weight can be what holds us stuck. One common pattern is “all or nothing”; either you’re on the program and following it perfectly or you’ve “fallen off the wagon”. This trap leaves no room for recognizing progress.

This pattern implies an either-or structure; either you’re on a program or you’re off it. If you are on a rigid diet program, it can be hard to follow for any length of time, as the very nature of a diet program is not sustainable.

A slip up is just that. It’s not the end, so as you catch yourself simply self-correct.

Or better yet, instead of a diet or program consider adopting a lifestyle way of eating, and with a few tweaks to lower your calories you will get you to your goal. Consider lower carbs with foods you do enjoy for a sustainable way of being, while reducing calories to achieve your desired healthy weight.

When you achieve your goal you will already have an integrated way of eating, and the transition to maintaining your enjoyable healthy lifestyle and weight will be so much easier.

2. OVER-GENERALIZING

Generalizing can be an efficient time saver. For example, we first learned to see a door, and we saw there are many types of doors. House doors, cupboard, car, garage doors and gates to name a few. When we’ve generalized all the different shapes and sizes and uses of doors, we don’t have to pause and think about each specific type of door, because we have generalized all doors and can effortlessly enter or exit at will.

But we also can generalize in a way that limits us. With this thinking pattern we can generalize in the opposite way, like when one major slip up triggers the whole weight loss goal or ourselves as an epic fail. This low quality thinking discounts all the positive actions and results that you’ve achieved to date and focuses mainly on the one slip up as a failure.

What if you switch it around and over generalize all the positive actions you take on a day to day basis? It’s a matter of where you put your focus. Keep a journal and record all the self-affirming actions you take, like making healthy meals you enjoy, parking further away and walking, and consciously choosing positive self-talk like you would with a friend. This is a great resource to shift a low mindset.

3. BLAMING

Giving away your personal power. I’ve heard this from clients: “My Mother made me go on diets since I was 10 and it’s her fault I’m overweight.” Or “My husband does all the cooking plus he brings home junk food and I can’t resist.”

Have you given away your personal power by blaming others? If you’re truly okay with your weight and are genuinely satisfied with how you are, then own that. And if not, then own that too. What do you need to do to take back your personal power? Take responsibility and like the flight attendants say, put the oxygen mask on yourself first before you assist anyone else. What one action can you take today to take back responsibility and reclaim your personal power?

An opportunity for coaching support

I’d love to hear your comments or feedback. And if you’d like to explore personal coaching, I’m presently open for just a few clients. If the time is now, let’s have a chat and discuss how I could help you achieve your personal goals. Call me 204.781.7972 or email janlaferriere@gmail.com