When I lose weight I’ll have CONFIDENCE

A common reason for wanting to lose weight is to gain confidence.

Many think they lack confidence because they haven’t hit their goal weight yet.

They believe they need to lose weight to feel confident before they can have the things they really want.

Common examples are: If I had confidence I could wear a bathing suit at the beach, I would start my business, or I would ask for a raise, or I would find Mr. Right.

Is this you?

We see others appearing confident, getting the things they want, and having a wonderful life. So we believe that we need confidence first to get what we desire.

Back in the 80s, as a young woman I admired Heather Locklear. I LOVED her big hair (remember I’m talking about the 80s and we had big hair!) and her golden life. She was gorgeous, had the body, any man she wanted, and fame and fortune. A charmed life. I’d thought she was extremely confident which was why she had an amazing life. But recently I read that she tried to commit suicide, had drunk driving charges, assaulted a police officer, stints in rehab.

Of course, knowing what I know now, I’d never want Locklear’s life. Turns out she’s human with her own insecurities. Turns out it doesn’t take confidence to get what we want.

Recently I heard a great distinction.

Confidence is a result – not a requirement.

Courage comes first. Confidence comes as a result of doing. Even if it’s baby steps.

What a relief!  You don’t need to wait for confidence!!!

That thing that you really want?

Courage comes first. Begin with taking a small step.

If you haven’t reached your goal yet, and need accountability, coaching, and support,I have a few spots left for you.

Courage begins with one step.
Email, call or text me today. 204.781.7972

Feeling Trapped with Excess Weight?

Here are 3 common fat thinking traps:

After seven years of providing weight loss coaching, I’ve seen that there are thinking patterns which limit success from achieving a naturally slender body weight.  Here are three common fat thinking traps:

1. ALL OR NOTHING

There are no 50 shades of gray in this way of thinking! How we think about our (excess) weight can be what holds us stuck. One common pattern is “all or nothing”; either you’re on the program and following it perfectly or you’ve “fallen off the wagon”. This trap leaves no room for recognizing progress.

This pattern implies an either-or structure; either you’re on a program or you’re off it. If you are on a rigid diet program, it can be hard to follow for any length of time, as the very nature of a diet program is not sustainable.

A slip up is just that. It’s not the end, so as you catch yourself simply self-correct.

Or better yet, instead of a diet or program consider adopting a lifestyle way of eating, and with a few tweaks to lower your calories you will get you to your goal. Consider lower carbs with foods you do enjoy for a sustainable way of being, while reducing calories to achieve your desired healthy weight.

When you achieve your goal you will already have an integrated way of eating, and the transition to maintaining your enjoyable healthy lifestyle and weight will be so much easier.

2. OVER-GENERALIZING

Generalizing can be an efficient time saver. For example, we first learned to see a door, and we saw there are many types of doors. House doors, cupboard, car, garage doors and gates to name a few. When we’ve generalized all the different shapes and sizes and uses of doors, we don’t have to pause and think about each specific type of door, because we have generalized all doors and can effortlessly enter or exit at will.

But we also can generalize in a way that limits us. With this thinking pattern we can generalize in the opposite way, like when one major slip up triggers the whole weight loss goal or ourselves as an epic fail. This low quality thinking discounts all the positive actions and results that you’ve achieved to date and focuses mainly on the one slip up as a failure.

What if you switch it around and over generalize all the positive actions you take on a day to day basis? It’s a matter of where you put your focus. Keep a journal and record all the self-affirming actions you take, like making healthy meals you enjoy, parking further away and walking, and consciously choosing positive self-talk like you would with a friend. This is a great resource to shift a low mindset.

3. BLAMING

Giving away your personal power. I’ve heard this from clients: “My Mother made me go on diets since I was 10 and it’s her fault I’m overweight.” Or “My husband does all the cooking plus he brings home junk food and I can’t resist.”

Have you given away your personal power by blaming others? If you’re truly okay with your weight and are genuinely satisfied with how you are, then own that. And if not, then own that too. What do you need to do to take back your personal power? Take responsibility and like the flight attendants say, put the oxygen mask on yourself first before you assist anyone else. What one action can you take today to take back responsibility and reclaim your personal power?

An opportunity for coaching support

I’d love to hear your comments or feedback. And if you’d like to explore personal coaching, I’m presently open for just a few clients. If the time is now, let’s have a chat and discuss how I could help you achieve your personal goals. Call me 204.781.7972 or email janlaferriere@gmail.com

Living Lightly Tip No.3

Set yourself up for Success with an Effortless 5% Improvement

Often when we’re wanting to make a change, we take on too much at once and set ourselves up to struggle. As an example, you’re not yet regularly exercising, but you decide that you want to join the gym and work out three times this week. Chances are that you’re not going to meet this expectation because it’s too big of a jump. Start small and go for an easy win.

To set yourself up for success, consider a small action over the next week with an easy intention or goal. What could you find yourself doing and enjoying?

It could be focusing on one healthy meal per day, or getting a pretty water bottle to hydrate more often, taking the stairs, or it could even be just dusting off your running shoes.

For example, if you want to begin exercising, a great way to start moving the body is walking.  This could be parking your car 5% further away and walking to the office. Or maybe it’s taking the stairs instead of the elevator. Or maybe it’s walking around the block once this week.

Make it a super easy no brainer 5% difference so that you hardly have to think about doing it.  And if you’re like many of us and you need to be held accountable to someone, send me an email or a text to 204.781.7972 with your intention and the date you’ll do it by. Make it easy to do. You’ve got this!

Choice Points

Each decision you make about food is a choice point; are you gliding closer toward or consistently backing away from your naturally slim goal?

For example, you’ve worked a few hours and need a break.  You feel that urge to eat a carb or sweet. Do you?

You’ve brought lunch to work but a fast food out would be so much more satisfying right now.

Or you’re done dinner for the evening and about to take a break in front of the TV, but you feel that urge to nibble. More carbs?

And are you even really hungry?

I’ve noticed when I’d take a short break from work outside of lunch hour, it was to fill in the time during the break and reward myself.

Or in the evening in front of the TV it was either for comfort or a treat after a long day.

Each choice is moving away from what you want, or it moves you closer to living lighter.

So ask yourself, “Do I want the snack now?” Stop.

Or do I want to wear shorts this summer? What’s the bigger picture, your bigger why?

But summer is awhile yet. So I’ll just have this snack now. This time.

If you stop at snack now, it’s likely an old habit that you’ve got well wired in. I mean if you’re really hungry and you already feel good in shorts, no biggie.

But if you do want to lose that excess weight and the old habitual habit is firing, it’s time to update the old fat thinking. You can rewire it by gliding past the food choice towards your real goal!

When you get the food-thought, actually replace the picture of the food-thought.

Imagine instead seeing yourself in shorts with greater confidence this summer, loudly declaring with a good fist pump to the sky, “Hell Yeah!”

To make a strong slim thinking connection, practice this each time you think of the old snack urge. Cancel it by replacing it with the new slim thought! Make it a big bright fun thought!

So where’s your “hell yeah”? On the beach? With friends?

Doesn’t that feel so much lighter now? Hell yeah!